Sleep Apnea and Diet updates

Another week went by and I have been slacking on the post.

I've been sleeping w/ the machine now for a week. It got worse after the first night and I was super frustrated for the 2nd, 3rd and 4th night. But I think I am getting used to it. I am not sleeping thru the night yet. I am trying to get used to it. I usually take the mask off sometime during the night after a few hours. I am also on the RX stimulants and I am supposed to take those twice a day. I still find myself falling asleep after breakfast for about an hour or 2. I need to find something to keep myself awake. Its annoying bc I just wanna watch tv.
Another issue I have is that as bedtime approaches I start to have anxiety. I want so badly to be able to sleep thru the night and feel amazing. I want to have my mask fit. I want to sleep comfortably. No leaking, bubbling mask. No tossing and turning trying to find a comfy spot. Frustrating. But I wont give up.

The diet is going well. It def helps that my momma is doing our grocery shopping. Keeps us on track. I know we can easily just go to the store and get crap foods but it is about accountability also. Its been over 2 weeks and it feels good. I need to start working out tho.

Alright. I updated so I feel better.
Ta-ta.

Whats wrong with me?

I dont understand whats happening?
I am completely terrified over something bad happening w/ me and Kevin. This feeling of intensity is turning into anxiety. Which is eventually gonna give me an ulcer.
It probably has something to do w/ having ZERO control over the situation. Since he has no phone and we only communicate via yahoo IM or gmail chat (very rarely his office phone) I cant just call or text and have him respond. You dont realize how comforting that is until you dont have it.
I'm gonna have to pray for peace and comfort for myself. lol
Ugh...

ETA: I know I sound crazy. I'm venting my "crazy" out and keeping it away from actual people bc I realize how I sound. lol